When I am home, I will think my thoughts lingering in my head.
The thoughts will say to me how I can escape life on this reality I live in
How will I leave this hazard that wants me gone
To create wings used to fly up to heaven.
I answered myself how I was going to fly to the gate of afterlife
Was I going to shoot myself?
Leaving my splattered brains all over the floor
Which use to think thoughts of regret and sorrow
Of the pain people were inflicting on me
Like the bullet which has ended my useless existence.
Was I going to slit my wrists?
The blade used to be my enemy
Now it was my friend for saving me from this lightless room
Blood that used to be red but now is black
From the never ending sadness I was carrying everyday
Now was released by the inflicted corspe.
Was I going to hang myself?
My body levitating from the floor
Used to be living but now is dea
The rope around my cracked neck
With the heart that was cracking
With the sadness and pain in my eyes
Looking down on the floor
Like the people used to look down upon me.
Was I going to jump of a bridge
Standing on the cold cement wal
Lifting my arms to spread my wing
In which I was to create very soon
Falling towards the old blue sanctuar
Where I was going to sleep in peace with tears falling from my fac
Everyday after death.
I didn’t care how I was going to die with these tools.
All I wanted was leaving this wasteland that offers me nothing
To go to others sharing my pain which they have escaped.
Will I die just like my dreams?
Which scythe will take my soul away
My life ends on this one night without goodbye but to myself:
Farewell to myself and others I will miss you so.